Today I went to the mall with a good friend of mine after lunch.  While we were walking through the mall I noticed people staring at me, nothing new.  I have been stared at my entire life.  The only times I've haven't been stared at was when I briefly worked in DC and when I visited New York over new years.  It was so odd walking around and not being leered at I had to readjust.  But anyway back to today.  While walking through Dillard's I noticed a man look me dead in the eye and move closer to the woman he was with.  Buy the time I got closer I could hear "don't turn around, check out this guy" and she did exactly what he said.  I smiled at them both and kept walking.  The reason that stuck out in my mind is because it was a white man.  Normally the people who go out their way to be rude or downright nasty to me in those cases are black (thats a whole other entry).  As i reentered the mall I noticed more people were moving closer to each other, voices dropped and the person they're speaking to going frozen.  What people don't realize glass is reflective.  I will say a couple were compliments but most were mean spirited or downright nasty and I know what they were about, MY HAIR!  Over the summer I was on the phone with a friend while walking by Nauticus and a boat with a family was going past me.  There was  teenage boy on the boat about 12/13 who pointed right at me and very loudly said "THAT GUY HAS LONG HAIR"! I remember that not because he was rude but because HIS HAIR WAS AT LEAST 4 INCHES LONGER THAN MINE!  I told my friend on the phone and he said "people aren't used to seeing black men with hair like yours".  I can swallow that but damn, it's not a purple mohawk.
To those who don't know I haven't cut my hair in over a year, in March I got it relaxed (straightened).  My hairdresser (Ladonia Lassiter @ Dillard's in Macarthur Mall) is a genius.  I have body for days, it shines like black silk and is so healthy you'd think I ate Purina One Dog food.  I can understand not being used to seeing black men with hair like mine in real life but I can name a few who are far more visible, Snoop Dogg (the reason I grew it out), Al Sharpton, Ice T, Cat Williams, James Brown, Michael Jackson and Prince.  I regularly get called Snoop or Michael and to be honest I like it, hey I've been called worse. Up until today people have been more complimentary.  As a rule if I'm checking out in a store and the clerk is a black female I'll get a 15 second stare then a compliment or who does your hair.  The one thing I hate is "is that all your hair"?  When my cousin visited from San Diego over the summer he was surprised at the length and quickly said  "you'd fit right in California".  I need to stress this was a style choice.  It has nothing to do with wanting to be white or not liking myself.  Anyone who's known me for a significant amount of time knows if I get bored with my look it's changing.  I've done it all from the Jheri Curl at the height of my Michael Jackson/Prince obsession to a Box Fade that was bleached 1/2 blond during the Yo MTV Raps phase to Bald then to Braids.  Straightening my hair has been the final frontier.  I honestly didn't think I'd like it b/c I it's a little limiting and I didn't want to maintenance it and thanks to Ladonia I don't have to. = )  I wont lie the comment and stares today did get to me but as I was leaving the mall the young lady in ticket booth remarked "you always come through my line and your hair always looks so nice".  That took the sting away from all the negativity.   Just goes to show we never know what saying something nice or complimentary to someone can do for their day.

First picture is the day I got it straightened in March, second picture is from June, third is from Labor Day and the last is from 5 minutes ago.